The Three Phase Plan to Get a Creepy Fangirl off Your Back
by TrustMe-IJustGetWeirder
Summary: Another multi-chap fic! Yay! FrUk with sides of PruHun, Spamano, Americaxfem!Egypt (weird, right?) and Shelly is Seychelles! It's a gauken AU with the right amount of fluff, humor and bad touch trio moments. I'm bad at explaining things, so just read it and enjoy! (and don't forget to become one with mother Russia, da? 0J0)
1. Chapter 1

**Hi! New story! FrUk, Spamano, and PruHun, and the title will make sense eventually~ Humor later! Enjoy!**

Arthur's POV

I strode into school, head down and hands shoved deep into my pockets. I tugged at the itchy neckline of my vest as my feet made contact with the cool linoleum floors of Hetalia High School. Sighing, I gazed into the sea of people, all wearing about the same thing as I. A long sleeved white shirt, grey sweater-vest with the school's insignia and blue lining, deep grey trousers (skirts for the girls- and Feilks) and shiny black shoes. Everything was the same as yesterday.

Making my way through the crowds to my locker, a challenge in itself, I spotted a girl waving at me. A large smile spread across her pretty features when I gave a half-hearted wave back in her direction. The cheery brunette bounced up tome and latched herself to my arm, half dragging me to my locker ignoring the disgruntled people she ran into. When we reached our desired location she turned to me and began to speak.

"Arthur!" she exclaimed "Francis is back in school! He's been gone for two weeks! Remember?" she squealed.

"How could I forget? You remind me every day." I asked, only half joking.

"But today he's back!" I cringed at her high pitched voice.

"Shelly, no need to yell." I groaned, still half asleep.

"But... But Francis is back from France!" she shrieked

"Something keeps telling me that. Now stop." She was giving me a massive headache at this point. I saw her pouting out of the corner of my eye. I sighed and massaged my temples before turning back to my zealous friend. "Is there something you'd like to say, Shelly?"

"This is the year, Arthur." I knew where this was going. "This is the year I'm going to get Francis Bonnefoy to go out with me!" she cackled "No other girl can stand in my way!" a dark purple aura had begun to engulf my friend. Usually this happened only to Ivan.

"God, Shell! Stop that! You're scaring people!" I said, glancing around at the cowering crowd of people.

"Sorry, Arthur." she said, returning to the normal, bubbly girl she usually was. I swear that she could be more bipolar than Elizabeta Heverdary. I quickly opened my locker and grabbed my books, shutting the metal door with a loud bang.

Turning my head, I saw the sea of people part down the middle to allow three figures to begin their stride down the halls. Flanked on each side, a blond man with sapphire eyes and fair skin led his friends down the corridor. On his left was an albino, eyes a malicious yet rather endearing shade of ruby. On the right, a joyful looking Spaniard with jade eyes and a laughing smile. I inwardly groaned.

It was them.

It wasn't as if I had anything _against_ Francis, Gilbert and Antonio, but actually, I did. Well, with one of them at least.

The frenchman, to be exact. He and I had a _history_ you could say. It all began in second grade when he transfered into Hetalia Primary School. He quickly made friends with Gilbert and Antonio and had all the girls in Mr. Rome's class fawning all over him. (That's one thing that hasn't changed over the years.) Anyways, I tried to grow my hair out to look like his, but where his was soft and silky and beautiful, mine looked as if someone had set a bush on fire, spray painted it blond, attempted to brush it down and then stuck it on my head.

Yeah, it was bad.

One day during tag, he chased me out into the big field behind the school. When I paused to catch my breath, he took out a pair of safety scissors and cut it back to its original length. He told me I looked good with short hair. I honestly don't know how that developed into me having a crush on him. But I do. I also don't understand how a schoolyard crush can last until senior year. But it has.

I looked up, glancing in Shelly's direction. She and about thirty other girls were oogling at the trio as they walked past. I knew from the start that I had little to no chance with Francis. Even if he did fancy me, Shelly would kill me, steal one of my books on magic (don't judge me), resurrect me, then let the other girls tear me to bits.

Could someone please tell my feelings that I didn't want to die yet? Much appreciated.

I began to walk to my first class, praying that I wasn't late. I stepped into the bleak room, moments before the bell. As I slid into my seat, my mind began to wander. I zoned out through my first few classes, Maths, Science, and P.E. not being my favorites. Soon the bell trilled, signaling lunch. I scurried down the halls, dodging into the lunch line and making my way out before I was crushed by the other hungry students.

I made my way to the social studies pod where I ate my lunch with my friends Kiku, Alfred (cousin), Matthew (Al's twin), and Shelly. When I arrived, I was shocked to see five people at a table that usually went unoccupied. Gilbert, Elizabeta, Antonio, and Lovino were all chattering amongst themselves, but my gaze landed on the frenchman who was desperately trying to get out of a conversation he was having. One with Shelly.

As I took my seat, unnoticed, (poor Mattie. I'll have to pay more attention to him) O heard their conversation play out.

"So, Francis." Shelly began. I couldn't help but notice that she sounded a bit creepy.

"Oui?"

"Do you think this weekend you would like to see a movie? The newest Maximum Ride came out." she batted her eyelashes and began to twist her hair around one finger. Francis looked quite uncomfortable and I mentally face palmed at Shelly's horrid flirtation.

"Non, I'm sorry belle, but I-" I cut him off.

"Oi! Wanker! She just had the guts to ask you out and you shoot her down like that? What the hell?" I asked him angrily. If I wasn't able to be happy with Francis, the closest thing would be helping Shelly find her happiness, but I don't know why I was getting so angry.

"Non, Arthur-"

"Don't start." I hissed at him. He drew back at bit, and looked at me in a rather confused way. Quite honestly I was confused as well, but I wasn't going to let on that I had no idea where my rage was coming from.

"Boys!" our teacher called "Out!" he pointed at the door (Hi Mr. Page if you're reading this. Not sure why you'd be, though...). I glared as we marched into the deserted hallway. I only spoke again once we were out of ear shot.

"Why would you do that, mate? She really likes you." I asked, exasperated. Many other boys would have said yes to Shelly's date, why not him? "Go out with her."

"Non, lapin. You don't understand." he started, his voice soft and silky.

"Yeah, I think I do." I interjected, my eyes glaring. "You think that you-" I was the one cut off this time. By soft lips connecting with my own.

**TBC~ Do you like it? I plan for more humor in the future, but I really appreciate feedback and comments make my day! I'm too lazy to translate the french for you, but it's pretty easy stuff. I knew it before I began taking french, so... good luck! Don't get lost in translation!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Time for chappie two! Don't worry! Shelly will return~ Enjoy, this I guess, it's kinda short though...**

Arthur's POV

I was shocked at first, to say the least. Remember that schoolyard crush? It was still there, rather embarrassingly setting my face on fire. They contrasted with my green eyes widening.

Francis moved to pull away, but I refused to let him slip through my fingers. Latching my arms firmly around his neck, I pulled him closer to me fitting nicely into his tall, lean body. His graceful arms clung to my waist, holding me to him. I felt nothing short of exhilaration as I let our lips dance.

The kiss was long and sweet, quite opposite to the lust-filled one I had expected from the frenchman. I was in heaven, standing in that hallway. We soon had to draw back, greedily gulping in large breathes of air. I spared a quick glance at Francis, only to find him smirking at me. I gave him a half hearted glare as he pressed our foreheads together, noses brushing, before pulling back again.

I let a small play across my face before planting a small peck on his lips. He was a good five inches taller than me, and so I had to stand on my toes to reach high enough to kiss him. I nestled my head into his shoulder, sighing contently. He wrapped his arms around my torso and gazed down to face me.

"I love you, cher." he said softly.

"Love you too, wanker." I mumbled before his pink lips crashed to mine again to share another sweet kiss. Our moment was cut short, however, when a screeching shattered the silence.

"ARTHUR! What the HELL are you DOING?!"

I was SO screwed.

**I told you it was short... The next chapter will be longer, I promise!**


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